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Your Guide to Supporting Transgender and Non-Binary Youth in K-12 Schools

Medically reviewed by Dr. Scott Mosser on January 11, 2025.

An estimated 300,000 youth aged 13-17 in the United States identify as transgender. Thanks to rising societal acceptance and visibility of gender diversity, the number of youth who are able to openly identify as trans and non-binary in the United States has been increasing steadily over the years. This means more and more families in the US have gender-diverse children. With this rise, an increasing number of parents have questions about how schools can support their youth.

Regardless of whether or not your child decides to “come out,” parents and guardians of transgender, non-binary, gender-expansive and genderqueer young people often worry about what can be done to keep their child safe in schools. In this article, we aim to address these common concerns and provide resources

Who is this page for?

The language of this page is directed at parents of transgender, non-binary and gender non-conforming young people in K-12 schools. This information is also relevant for educators, school staff, and trans youth who are navigating a gender transition at schools.

Occasionally, trans youth might not have the support from parents, family, or guardians to live in their truth at home or at school. If you are a supportive adult who has found yourself assisting a young trans person, you can use this page to help you guide them through this process.

Navigating a gender transition and informing schools, teachers, and administrators might be an important part of your child’s process. Throughout this page you will find resources to move these important conversations forward and further help you and your child with this process.

Key terms

The following key terms are used throughout the following article:

• Trans: A person who is trans or transgender has a gender identity that transcends the one they were assigned at birth. For example, someone assigned female at birth may identify as a man or boy.
• Non-binary: A person who is non-binary does not identify exclusively as a man or woman.
• Gender-variant and gender non-conforming: These are umbrella terms that refer to individuals whose gender identity and/or presentation does not align with their gender assigned at birth.
• Transition: Transition is the process through which an individual lives a life that is more aligned with their gender identity. Not everyone who identifies as trans or non-binary undergoes transition. Gender diverse young people and adults can take any of the following steps to affirm their identity if they would like:
  • Social transition: This can involve changing the name and/or pronouns (he/him, she/her, they/them, etc.) you go by.
  • Legal transition: This can involve changing your name and/or sex/gender marker on your official documents (e.g., drivers license, school ID, etc.).
  • Medical transition: This can involve taking puberty blockers, hormone therapy or undergoing gender-affirming surgical procedures to modify your body so that it is more congruent with your gender.
• Gender dysphoria: Gender dysphoria describes a persistent sense of discomfort and/or distress caused by a conflict between a person’s gender identity and their gender assigned at birth. Gender dysphoria can be triggered by the use of a name or pronoun that does not align with the person’s identity and/or a part of their body that is not congruent with their internal sense of self. Not all gender diverse youth experience gender dysphoria. According to the DSM V and various professional associations, being trans or non-binary is not a problem that needs treating. Rather, gender-affirming care can help an individual manage the distress that their dysphoria produces.

How might a trans child “transition” in school?

As a parent or guardian, the first important step is to have an open conversation with your child about their wants and needs regarding coming out at school. Is it entirely possible that your child doesn’t want to come out to their teachers or classmates, and in that case, those wishes should be respected. Not all young trans people feel safe or comfortable coming out at school, and many trans youth just don’t want or need to. However, if your child does want to come out at school, here are some tips.

Your child’s desire to shift their gender expression at school stems from a need to be recognized as their authentic and true self. Therefore, the process for helping your child outwardly affirm their gender identity at school should be uniquely tailored to making school a positive and productive place for them. There is no one correct way to go about this process. You will likely have to choose from a list of elements that you and your child feel comfortable changing at school. These options include, but are not limited to:

Legal and Social Transition

• Name: Either legal, meaning they want to go through the name change process so their identification documents show their desired name, or administrative, meaning that they want to avoid the legal processes but still be addressed by their desired name and have it reflected on their school records. Your young person can also ask others to use another name without any official changes being made to school or government records.
• Pronouns: A shift in pronouns might help alleviate anxiety around being misgendered at school.
• Facility use: They might want to change the bathroom and/or locker room they use.
• Gender expression: This might mean a shift in clothing or other outward expressions of gender identity.

Medical Transition

For some trans and non-binary adolescents, the effects of puberty—like the voice deepening, facial and body hair growing thicker, menstruation and breast development—may be unwanted and trigger gender dysphoria. In this case, with parental consent and multidisciplinary support, youth who have initiated puberty can start pubertal blockers to pause these effects.

Puberty blockers are a reversible medical treatment that allow adolescents to stop and delay the effects of puberty. Adolescents with the support of their parents/guardians can then take testosterone or estrogen hormone therapy, which does have irreversible effects, to undergo a puberty more aligned with their gender.

For some trans and non-binary individuals, surgery can also be a part of their medical transition. With parental consent and the support of a multidisciplinary healthcare team, some minors may be eligible for chest reconstruction top surgery, sometimes called mastectomy.

Factors to take into consideration for your young person’s transition:

It is important to take different factors to take into consideration when embarking upon this process.

• Timing
  • How urgently does your child want to shift their gender expression, name, pronouns, facility use, etc.?
  • What might the outcomes be if your child can’t make these shifts as quickly as they want?
  • Is your child currently experiencing harassment or bullying from students or school staff? Are these shifts likely to exacerbate or reduce this harm?
• Age and grade level
  • How old is your child? Are they likely to have peers who understand shifts in outward expression of gender?
  • Does your child regularly participate in gender-separate activities at school? How might this impact their decision to shift their gender expression at school?
• Privacy
  • Does your child want other people to know about their gender history? What are steps that can be taken to avoid your child being “outed”?
  • Who are going to be safe adults for your child to turn to if issues around privacy come up?
• Student information
  • Does your child want their name and gender marker changed on official student record?
  • If not, how will you help ensure that they are not dead-named with new teachers, at new schools, or with new friends?
  • If so, do you know how to support your child in changing their name and gender marker legally and/or on official school documents?
• Transgender students without family support
  • Is the young trans person you’re supporting safe to express their gender at home or with parents and family?
  • If not, how might you help a young trans person shift their gender expression at school if they need to be discreet in front of parents, family, or guardians?
  • How will you help them create a safety plan in case their privacy or gender history is violated at school or at home?

Know your rights: trans youth in schools

Many parents, guardians and care-takers of gender-diverse youth, are curious about what legal protections their child has in school. This information will update as time goes on. We expect some shifts in policy at the federal level after a change in presidential administration in 2025 and will update this page as any important changes are made.

States that do not protect the rights of trans and gender variant minors

As of January 2025…

• 14 states in the United States have bans on trans youth using bathrooms that correspond to their gender identity in K-12 schools. On top of this, there are an additional 3 states outside of these 14 that define “sex” in ways that may impact transgender people’s access to bathrooms or facilities according to their gender identity.
• 25 states have outlawed allowing trans youth from participating on school sports teams that align with their gender identity.

States that have protections for trans and gender-variant minors

As of January 2025, 20 states and the District of Columbia (D.C.) have passed explicit legislative anti-discrimination protections on the basis of a student’s gender identity and sexual orientation. Even in states that currently do not have said protections, discrimination on the basis of sex is prohibited. These protections have and can be applied to protect trans and non-binary K-12 students from gender-identity based discrimination.

Many school districts have further articulated a transgender student’s right to access bathrooms consistent with their gender identity, including in locations without statewide protections.

Resources to help you support your child’s transition at school

If you are looking for resources to help you talk to schools about your child’s transition, you’re in luck; there is a community of folks out there working on exactly this issue. We’ve compiled some important resources and guides below.

If you are looking to help your child create a plan to get teachers and school staff on the same page about a gender transition, you should take a look at Gender Spectrum’s Gender Support Plan. Here, you will find a form to help you, your child, and school staff discuss things like name changes, facility use, and safe adults on campus for your child to turn to.

These next two resources are for district level employees and school staff who wish to make their campuses safer for trans and gender non-conforming young people. If you are a parent or caregiver of a trans young person or you are trans yourself, feel free to pass these along to your school staff if you think these resources would be well received and utilized appropriately. First, Gender Spectrum’s Gender Inclusive Schools Framework touches on the various levels that gender is taught in schools and classrooms, and addresses ways that teachers and school staff can help create gender inclusive schools for all students. Second, GLSEN and NCTE partnered to create the Model School District Policy as a guide for how to model a school district that creates a safe space for students who are trans, non-binary, and gender-expansive.

In summary

• Not all students who are transgender or gender non-conforming choose to navigate a gender transition at their schools.
• For those who do, there are factors that should be considered when going through the process, including timing, privacy matters, and safe adults to turn to at school and at home.
• Gender Spectrum, GLSEN, and NCTE all have resources on their websites to help trans youth and their adult allies navigate a gender transition at school.
• The National Education Association put out a guide for schools in partnership with the Transgender Law Center, ACLU, the Human Rights Campaign, and the National Center for Lesbian Rights. Check it out if you work for a school and want more information about how to support trans youth on your campus.